A MarketPlace of Ideas

Original Arty at:  Sensible shoes for work that become killer heels at night

The only problem I see is that they do not have a hooker setting.

Some girls got da choos and some girls don’t got da choos.  Jimmy Choo Shoes.

Google’s goal to organise your daily life  and I have thought of a great way to utilized this process.   Google will need to characterize your life.  In doing this they will do a “spectral analysis” of your life and proclivities.  At some point in the future I think the government should get involved and do the same thing.   Then when you do not buy enough toothpaste and endanger the employment rates of toothpaste workers you can be automatically billed via your credit card and the toothpaste dispatched forthwith to your residence.

Building on this idea I realized that bum that you see on the corner can be partially allocated to the people in your neighborhood.  Then once every six weeks for instance you are allocated to give the bum a bath and a meal and to sleep on your couch 1 night. 

This idea is genius.  There are all sorts of potential extensions of this idea.   Since we’re forced to pay taxes for various government boon doogles why not require direct involvement in them all.  Naturally you would be unpaid as the services you provide would be in lieu of your taxes.  For instance an unwed mother with 4 children from 4 different fathers…..you can help babysit them!   I think I’ll hold out for fathering the unwed mothers babies and let you take care of them.  Maybe I’ll get involved in hand carving the 400 dollar crapper seats! 

This is embarrassing but I had yet another celebrity infested dream.  I am not one given to royalty worship but yet I have these dreams where they show up.  When they are very vivid and funny I have to share.  Here is the latest one:

I’m in a garage admiring a 1978 Ford Pinto. You know one of the last models and it had that one with the garish grillwork. It as in perfect condition and all polished up.  The interior was perfect.  It was one marvelous Pinto.  In walks David Spade:

David starts talking about how he’s kept the car all these years since it was new because he doesn’t want to let go of his childhood.   He goes on to say its a really great car and that it has a killer boom box in it.  He pulls out a chrome plated speaker box and shows me.

I’m duly impressed by his nostalgia and launch into how its nostalgic for me as my dead mother drove a Ford Pinto.  Of course I comment on how “down to earth he is for a hollywood type”.

When we’re done talking David’s sister meets us in the garage and says “You’re driving right ?!”  ….like she was excited to be rolling in the Pinto.  I was excited too because Dave’s sister was cute and we could ride in the back while Dave chauffeured us.

Yes Ford Pinto. You remember it?  If you drove it over 70 the windows would roll themselves down. 

**As a FootNote: In Brazil they use the word “pinto” as slang for penis.  Thus if you own one you are driving a Ford Penis.

See some sweet Ford Pintos